Single-Hearted: A Woman's Imperative Pursuit

To start, I want to clarify that this is by no means a call to celibacy for the unmarried, it is a call to recognize a frequently over-spoken and under-enacted priority to our First Love. I want to make note that I believe this topic applies not only to the unmarried but also to the married, for it is a pursuit that is not distinguished by one's relational status nor is it brought to completion upon marriage. However, I have written this primarily with unmarried women in mind because this is the group with whom I currently identify myself. It is my prayer as we journey together under grace, toward Christ's likeness that we, His daughters, might spur each other on in this critical area.
The issue at hand:
Ladies, we live in a culture that demands pleasure in many forms and we are bombarded daily with the pressure to live up to that standard. Our expectations of men and of love are warped by our culture's emphasis on these various forms of satisfaction and our morals are slowly degraded and diluted by the invitation to partake - whether that be mentally or physically. Many of those around us (maybe this describes you) jump from one significant other to the next and do not understand why there is no sense of fulfillment to be found in any of them. Maybe you have never dated, but in your mind you have held onto a series of men emotionally to the point that they might as well have been your mental boyfriends. Maybe you are in a place where many of your girlfriends are setting up the perfect wedding with the man of their dreams and you stand wide-eyed on the side coveting what they have and praying that one day (soon) it could be you and your Mr. Right making the same preparations. Or maybe you're married and cannot, for the life of you, understand why the man to whom you pledged your life is not all that you originally thought him to be. 
Maybe, just maybe, we have begun to believe a lie.
 A look into the Book:
So many times when studying the path the Israelites took, we are amazed that these people could be so blind. Time after time they forgot the promises of God, they forgot the goodness of God, they forgot the provision of God. Let's hone in on a specific time in Israel's history ... 1 Samuel 8:1-9

When Samuel became old, he made his sons judges over Israel. The name of his firstborn son was Joel, and the name of his second, Abijah; they were judges in Beersheba. Yet his sons did not walk in his ways but turned aside after gain. They took bribes and perverted justice. Then all the elders of Israel gathered together and came to Samuel at Ramah and said to him, "Behold, you are old and your sons do not walk in your ways. Now appoint for us a king to judge us like all the nations." But the thing displeased Samuel when they said, "Give us a king to judge us." And Samuel prayed to the Lord. And the Lord said to Samuel, "Obey the voice of the people in all that they say to you, for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected me from being king over them. According to all the deeds that they have done, from the day I brought them up out of Egypt even to this day, forsaking me and serving other gods, so they are doing to you. Now then, obey their voice; only you shall solemnly warn them and show them the ways of the king who shall reign over them."

Jump down to verses 19-22a:

But the people refused to obey the voice of Samuel. And they said, "No! But there shall be a king over us, that we also may be like all the nations, and that our king may judge us and go out before us and fight our battles." And when Samuel had heard all the words of the people, he repeated them in the ears of the Lord. And the Lord said to Samuel, "Obey their voice and make them a king."

Obviously asking the Lord for a manly companion is not the quite same thing as requesting a kingly ruler for the nation. However, the union of a man and a woman in the act of marriage is one of THE most beautiful displays of God's character and when we treat it as the Israelites did in asking Samuel to appoint a king so that they might be like the surrounding nations, we pervert a beautiful display of our Lord. It then becomes an act of selfish idolatry and through our actions we are telling the Lord that He is no longer enough for us. We are no greater than the Isrealites; oh, how quickly we forget the promises, the goodness, and the provision of God!
The reality is:
If all we desire is a man, that is all we will get. God has called us higher; He has called us to Himself.
My dear friends, If we cannot be content now in this blessed time of singleness with the Maker and Lover of our souls, how will we ever be content in marriage with a man who, as godly as he may be, was born into sin just like you and I. The reality is this: he is sure to let us down with such heavy, unrealistic expectations upon his shoulders. The good Christian man we seek cannot - and will not - be perfect. In placing such expectations on the shoulders of a man, we ultimately set the relationship or marriage up for failure. Only in Christ will we find fullness of joy; to elevate a man to the same level is idolatry.

By no means do I profess to be a relational expert... quite the opposite actually! I have never before been in a relationship with a man and consequentially do not consider myself to be in a place where marriage is just around the corner. But all qualifications aside, I do know an issue when I see one. And, ladies we most certainly have an issue.
Instead of aimlessly searching for our "soul-mate," may we ever walk in obedience and seek to grow closer to the Lord. Instead of dreaming, wishing, pining, and ultimately wasting valuable time in an attempt to fill the void in our hearts with things that our culture claims will satisfy, may we surrender our desires to the only One who is able to satisfy our longing hearts. Dear one, it is what we were created for! We must pray that He would become greater in every area of our lives - including that of our singleness.

May we learn now, in this precious time of singleness, to be single-hearted.